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happyevraftrA/N: Hey guys! I've wrote another Delena one-shot =D This one gets steamy so walk away if lemons make you uncomfortable or its not age appropriate for you. I've officially turned this into a collection of one-shots as the all relate to each other. This is the third in my series I'm calling "Always You". Go read "Jar of Hearts" and "Waiting" first, you can find them in my journal or on my fanfic site.
Story is from Elena's POV and takes place the night Damon tells her he loves her and erases her memory.
I was in that place of not fully asleep, but not really awake when I felt something tickle my leg. I was beyond annoyed something was trying to interrupt my sleep so I tried kicking it away. In my state of lucid consciousness I thought I heard a low chuckle, but brushed away the idea. With the craziness going on in my life lately I rarely got to sleep and I cherished the few hours I was able to get a night. As far as I was concerned, mysterious touches and musical laughter were not going to lull me from my slumber.
For five more glorious minutes I succeeded in my mission to sleep, but then I felt a finger slide down my cheek and my eyes jumped open, landing on two ice blue orbs. My brain told me to scream, but the look in his eyes made me keep quiet. He looked like a man who had completely lost his way and was finally staring at the light to guide him home. Love, admiration, trust and joy were all displayed across his features. My brain sounded a red alarm at me- there was no reason Damon should be in my bed, but I couldn't reject him again when he had that look in his eyes. Slowly, I brought my hand up to his face and stroked his cheek.
"Damon, what is it?"
He shifted himself closer to my side, placed his hand on my hip and propped his head up on his other arm. "I made you forget something tonight when I brought you back your necklace. When I left I didn't go home, I stayed outside making sure you were safe. When you started saying my name in your sleep I couldn't stay away. I care about you so much, and even though I don't deserve you I wanted you to remember that much."
I stared at him in shock and rolled the vervain filled pendant between my fingers.
"Why would you take something like that away Damon?" Tears pooled at the corner of my eyes and my heart clenched; something I shouldn't have been entirely used to happening around Damon.
"What exactly did you say to me?" I whispered. My heart was racing, my palms were clammy and beads of perspiration were making themselves known. He smiled sweetly- something I don't ever remember seeing before – and kissed my forehead in a gesture that seemed so familiar and yet so far away.
"That's not important, I just needed you to know that I'm here for you, I care for you and you don't need to be afraid. I'll be just outside so please get some sleep." He brushed his thumb underneath my eyes bringing attention to the dark circles that had gathered underneath them. "You need it."
He moved to stand up, but I grabbed his hand and pulled him back towards me. "Don't go."
His eyes moved over my face, scrutinizing every detail to try and figure out my motives. To be honest, I didn't even know myself; all I knew is that my heart would break and my world would fall down around me if he left just then. He was saying he cared about me, but somehow it felt like he was saying goodbye.
There was no way to explain it, absolutely no rationale behind it, but I desperately needed Damon Salvatore. With a heavy sigh that expressed how wrong all of this was, he curled in beside me and took me in his arms. As he kissed the top of my head, a burst of contentment rolled through me and I smiled to myself. It had been far to long since I'd smiled- really smiled like that. Maybe it was because I knew how dangerous Damon was, but that he was on our side that made me feel safe with him. Or it could have been the fact that when he touches me I know I'm the only thing in the world that can bring out this side of him and I also know he'll do anything to protect that; including sacrificing himself which scared me to death. A part of me knew I would be beyond devastated if Damon died on my behalf.
"Everything's going to be ok 'Lena. I'll make sure of it." He squeezed me tighter and I smiled again.
"Thank you for being here."
"Of course." Those two little words held so much meaning and so much truth. No matter where our friendship stood, or how much we hated each other- he was always there for me, always saving me.
We laid in peace for some time until he started tracing circles on my back. While it was meant to be soothing my body immediately started to buzz with excitement and longing. Before thinking about what I was doing, I slipped my hand underneath his shirt and explored the rock hard plains of his chest. He froze under my touch and gasped in surprise. His hand came between us and grabbed my wrist, stopping my advances.
"What are you doing?" His voice was tinged with longing, anger, sadness and hope. My cheeks blazed red with my embarrassment.
"I don't know, I just…..it felt right." I meant it too, it felt beyond right to be with him in that moment. I felt connected to him in a way I couldn't explain. His eyes were such a torrent of emotions that even I couldn't tell what he was thinking. He settled on anger before answering me.
"I care about you, I just told you that, but I will not be your stand in while you're having issues with my brother. I won't stay here if you regret things in the morning or go running back to him." His face softened before he continued. "I couldn't take it."
My heart breaks for him and in that moment I realize that I have most certainly been lying to Damon, Stefan and myself, because it won't "always be Stefan". Right now it's all Damon.
"I can't promise anything about the future, with the axe hanging over my head and all, but I can tell you that I lied in the past. You were right the night you came here trying to force me to admit my feelings for you. Like I told you, I was scared of being like Katherine. But now that I may not have much time left, you need to know that I do care for you Damon Salvatore." Tears were streaming down my face, the overflow of all the emotion I was feeling for him. Slowly, I raised my lips to his and gave him a sweet kiss. He resisted for a moment before wrapping his arms around me and pulling me in tight against his chest.
His lips were as soft as I remembered and moved languorously over mine. My heart expanded and grew until it was so full of the love he was pouring into the kiss. When his tongue darted out to taste my lips I thought I was going to die from all the pleasure and emotions flowing between us. The bond between us started to spark before it erupted into a blaze that I knew would never be tampered down. He was right, there was no going back after this. I had made my choice and it was him.
With increasing urgency I ran my hands up his back and through his hair, doing everything I could to pull him closer to me. Parting my lips, I let him fully taste me. I moaned feeling his tongue against my own. His kiss was so overly Damon; fierce, soft, frightening, loving, frantic and controlled, that I thought I would pass out from the tingles of pleasure it sent throughout my body.
Needing to feel more of him, I scooted closer, gasping in his mouth when our bodies touched. He pulled away to let me breath, and instead started placing kisses on my neck, over my collarbone and across my chest. Each place he kissed burned with fierce intensity and made me feel alive. Finally, he placed a kiss on my forehead and leaned back to look in my eyes. I was probably more out of breath than before we stopped kissing so all I could do was silently plead for him to continue.
Tenderly, he reached up and brushed a stray piece of hair out of my eyes before cupping my cheek in his hand. This time I didn't resist my feelings and leaned into his touch, relishing the way his skin felt on mine.
"I've waited for this for so long."
"Me too." I managed to whisper. His smirk appeared and it looked like he wanted to tell me 'told you so', but he refrained. Instead, he gingerly placed one hand on the back of my head and the other around my back. With lustful force he pulled me into him and kissed me with so much passion my toes began to curl. His hands started to roam; eventually one landed in-between my thighs and started stroking me over my pajama shorts. The unexpected contact caused my back to arch, pushing my chest closer to him. He took that as an invitation and started nibbling on the tops of my breasts. A strangled moan drifted onto the night air, one of many that night.
More gentile that I though possible, he pulled my tank top over my head and threw it across the room. Since I was ready for bed I had been braless and was now fully exposed to hi m. His eyes raked over my exposed form and I had never felt more beautiful and womanly. The depth of lust and desire conveyed in his eyes was all for me and I loved it. He brought his hands up to my chest and barely ghosted his fingers across my skin. I couldn't decide if I wanted to scream at him to get on with it already, or to continue with his erotic torture.
Just when I was going to beg him to really touch me, his mouth descended on my nipple and sucked it in-between his luscious lips. Wetness pooled between my thighs and my breath caught in my throat. We had just barely begun and I couldn't even breathe anymore. The endorphins throughout my body were being exorcised to the extreme and it was driving me crazy.
He switched to the other nipple and unable to function anymore, my head flopped backs and my eyes rolled upwards. His lips and tongue were so talented that I couldn't help but wonder what he could do with them in a more sensitive area. My cheeks blazed red at the idea and my heart accelerated.
Noticing the change in me, he pulled back and tilted my chin down to make me look at him.
"What do you want? What made you feel so excited?"
I think I visibly gulped and considered resisting him. But then again, I realized there was no point in even thinking about it. Damon could give me everything I needed and everything I never knew I wanted. With my decision made I pulled away from him and shimmied out of my underwear. When I spoke, I barely recognized my own voice- it was so husky and laced with a deep need. "I want you to use your mouth on me here." I explained as I parted my legs for him. His eyes widened to an alarming size before another genuine smile graced his handsome features. He had a nice show of my womanhood and it was hard not to squirm under his appreciative gaze.
"I don't think you'll ever stop surprising me." He said before dipping down and engorging his tongue in my glistening opening. I screamed and fisted my hands in the sheets. I had been very right that he would be good eating me out. The sensations he was creating were beyond pleasurable, they were downright addictive.
He moaned and I watched as a shutter wracked his body. "You taste divine and sinful at the same time. I don't think I'll ever get enough." The way he was ravaging me with his mouth, I had to believe he was being truthful. The coil in my belly was growing to unprecedented heights and I was worried I wouldn't survive the fall I was about to take.
His mouth clamping onto my clit was the end for me. My hands abandoned the sheets to grab hold of his raven locks. My back arched off the bed so high that it was almost painful, my body convulsed with waves of pleasure from my orgasm. He had taken me to a place where all I could do was feel. There were no reservations, no thoughts getting in the way, just complete satisfaction and raw emotion.
When I finally came down from my high, I opened my eyes to see him grinning up at me from in-between my legs. "I take it you enjoyed that?" My vocal cords still weren't working so I just nodded at him. He sat up and I realized he had divested himself of his shirt. Lust immediately swelled in me and I felt a burning need to return the amazing favor he had just done for me. I sat up on my knees and brought his face to mine for a deep kiss. His lips still had my residue on them but I found it to be sensual rather than gross.
"Take your pants off." I whispered in his ear before gently biting it.
He stood up from the bed and started swaying his hips in what could only be construed as one hundred percent seductive. His agile fingers brushed over his hip bones until finally landing on the buttons of his jeans. More than anything I wanted to see those fingers move, but he remained motionless, still swinging his hips back and forth. With great effort I tore my eyes away from the package I was waiting to see unwrapped and met his eyes. He smiled at me and finally popped the button open. The sound drew my attention and caused my heartbeat to crank up another notch. Again, he stopped undoing his pants until I met his eyes. Figuring out what he wanted, I kept my gaze locked with his as he lowered his zipper and let the jeans fall to the floor.
He stood still as I looked him up and down, trying to memorize every inch of his gorgeous body.
"You're beautiful."
"Yeah I know" He smirked at me. Obviously, he wasn't uncomfortable being completely exposed in front of me.
"No, I mean you're really beautiful. Not just on the outside. You're a beautiful person."
He smiled before he stalked his way over to the bed and pounced on me like the predator he was.
"I'm going to devour you." He told me while crawling his way up my body. I felt his impressive member settle on my thigh and I wanted nothing more than for him to bury himself so deep inside me that I could never get away. Notions of returning his earlier favor fled my mind as my body begged to feel him inside me.
"Well I'm yours for the taking." I replied. His eyes lit up and he gave me a sweet kiss. His fingers dance along my skin all the way down to my center to make sure I was ready for him. I most definitely was, proven by the glistening wetness that coated his fingers. His tongue darted out to clean his fingers and I thought I was going to have another orgasm just from the picture he painted.
His body came close to mine and he cupped my cheek in his hand. "Are you sure? No regrets?" The vulnerability in his eyes astounded me. I was freely offering myself to him and he was still giving me a way out in case I needed it. Letting me see that side of him was so special to me and a single tear dropped from the corner of my eye.
"Absolutely no regrets. I want you Damon Salvatore." A held breath escaped his lungs and he squeezed me against his chest. The tip of his manhood was pressing against my entrance, making my body scream in anticipation.
"I love you." He whispered as he slowly pushed himself inside me. I wanted to answer him, but my vocal cords were broke again. All I could focus on was the insatiable feeling of him moving inside me. We were one in the body, but what I hadn't expected was for it to feel like he was touching my heart and soul too. We were meant to be together, nothing could ever convince me otherwise after this. My walls pulsed around him making him groan in delight. Once he filled me to the hilt he stopped moving and we both basked in the feeling.
He nuzzled my neck and I finally found my voice. "I love you too. So much." After a few moments I felt something wet hit my cheek and I knew he was silently crying- celebrating the fact he was finally loved. When he started moving again, I though my world was coming to and end. His thrusts were sure and deep, eliciting a deep pitted pain so acute it was dangerously pleasurable.
After I became accustomed to his rhythm, I started meeting him thrust for thrust. I grabbed on to his arms to try and keep myself grounded.
"Let go, I have you." With a profound amount of trust I obeyed him and let myself get lost in everything that was us. The ecstasy of the moment took me so high I felt like I was having an out of body experience. When wave after wave of release washed over me I truly believed I was going to pass out. I wanted to scream his name, but I couldn't move or speak I was so paralyzed by the experience. Still seeking his own end, Damon picked up his speed which only increased the euphoria I was going through. When I felt his member throb inside me I knew he was close so I turned my head to the side, giving him invitation to show me every part of who he is.
Just as I felt him swell and release his seed deep inside me, his fangs pierced my neck and I was swimming through a pool of unadulterated pleasure once again.
"Oh, Damon!"
I woke up with a scream on my lips, bolting strait up in bed. I slapped my hand over my chest trying to keep my heart from thumping out of it. My body was humming with electricity, my skin was covered in a sheen of sweat and the proof of my orgasm was evident between my legs.
'It was just a dream.' It felt so real though, like my subconscious wouldn't let me keep things buried anymore. I didn't know what triggered the fall of my internal wall, but it was gone and I wasn't prepared to deal with the aftermath. Tears started streaming down my face as the swells of pent-up emotions came crashing down on me with full force. I didn't know what to do or how to accept the abundance of feelings flowing through me. I tried to just sit still and let it pass, but the thrumming never stopped. Over fifteen minutes after I woke up I was still bombarded with images from my dream and a deep need began to build between my thighs. My heart ached to have Damon there to hold me, which made me cry even harder. I didn't understand why I was feeling like this, and even more specifically, why now. Things had certainly been different between us since the night he came to my room after Katherine tried to ruin him. There were times we would share a look and I swore he could see straight to my soul. Our connection was alive and burning with intensity, but I tried to fight it every day in order to preserve my relationship with Stefan. It was supposed to be only Stefan.
"I made you forget something tonight…" I gasped as I thought of his words in the dream and my hand shot up to my necklace. I realized I didn't actually know how I had gotten it back. Could Damon have compelled me to forget something and then given me back my necklace? Even if he did, did I really want to know? If my dream was any indication, he had made me forget his confessed feelings for me. Surprisingly, my heart broke at the though, just as it had in my dream.
I sat up and brought my knees under my chin, curling myself into a ball. More tears fell like a waterfall from my swollen and red eyes. Things were already so complicated in my life and this added to the mountainous pressure on me. I took my diary out and began to write everything down. Writing has always been a release for me; it helps me clear my mind and acts as an outlet for overflowing emotions.
After I finished my entry I let out a deep breath, only feeling marginally better. I realized I had two choices- I could act like nothing happened or I could confront Damon about the situation. The obvious answer to me was to talk to Damon and resolve all the emotions my dream had drudged up. However, I really didn't have any right to broach the subject unless I was planning on admitting my reciprocated feelings and I wasn't in a place to do that. All I knew was that I couldn't break him again; I'd already done that far too many times and I knew he was still waiting for me. A small voice in the back of my head whispered I was hurting him no matter what because it broke him a little inside every time he saw me with Stefan.
I groaned in frustration and slammed my fists into the bed. I felt so confused and lost. Regardless of the fact Stefan and I were no longer together, I still felt it was so wrong to have feelings for his brother. And it was definitely wrong to have such an erotic and emotionally charged dream about someone else. I had promised myself months ago that I wouldn't be Katherine and I intended to keep that promise.
"Having problems sleeping?" I jumped and yelped at the same time, caught off guard by a new presence in my room. After I realized just who was in front of me, my nerves came back full force and more tears gathered in my eyes. He was at my side in an instant.
"Bad dream? I heard you crying." I wanted to ask why he was even here, or more importantly, why it wasn't Stefan, but I didn't. The look in his eyes reminded me of the Damon in my dream and it only confirmed my suspicious- he had definitely compelled me to forget something. So there I was at the crux of my crossroad, really down to the huge elephant in the room that I had always kept at bay; did I want Damon Salvatore or not? Was I done waiting, was it our time?
"Yeah, you know Klaus trying to kill me and all. Doppelganger stuff." The lie came out before I could stop myself, but it gave me my answer. I wasn't ready to know yet. I couldn't hurt him and I just wasn't prepared to fully admit my feelings. There were too many unresolved issues between Stefan and I and all the other things going on in my life. As of right now, I still had feelings for Stefan and he was still my choice- I just didn't know if it would always be Stefan like I had once thought.
"You need me to stay?" More than anything I wanted to say yes, but the hope in his eyes made me pause. I knew if he stayed I would end up hurting him the next morning when I still choose Stefan. Not to mention the fact that I was still ridiculously aroused and didn't trust myself around him. So instead I gave him a sweet smile and shook my head.
"No, that's ok. Thanks for checking on me though." He gave me a nod and we both ignored the fact he had to of been close by to have heard my sobs. I just hoped I didn't say his name while I was sleeping.
"Sleep well Elena." He leaned in close and brushed a kiss over my forehead. My breath caught in my throat and shivers went rolling up and down my spine. I closed my eyes and doubted my decision for a split second. It was exactly like the kiss from my dream and I knew it held so much more meaning than I could comprehend with my missing memories. When he pulled back his face was clouded with worry and curiosity.
He went to walk away and I felt that same sadness I had dreamt earlier; like he was trying to say goodbye.
"Wait!' He turned around and looked at me quirking an eyebrow.
"Don't say goodbye. Don't give up on me." I knew it was selfish to ask, and it made me more like her, but I couldn't find it in me to care. A sad smile spread across his face as he nodded at me.
"Have a good night Damon." I whispered to him.
"Oh, I always do. Maybe I'll show you sometime. I promise you, I'm better than your wildest dreams." He flashed me that infamous smirk before jumping out my window. I blushed fire-engine red and felt embarrassed beyond belief. Hoping his words were a complete accident (and not really believing for one second that they were) I rolled over onto my side and pulled the covers up to my chin. My heart still clenched in pain; I knew now that no matter what I did I would hurt one of them, but seeing Damon had significantly calmed me down. I still had a lot to figure out, but there was no denying I still had feelings for Damon Salvatore and they were only getting stronger. Perhaps the wait was almost over.
The end of the chapter is obviously where I was attempting to keep people in character. Please R&R. I'd like to continue writing one-shots for this series and was thinking about doing another one from Damon's POV after Rose dies. What would you guys like to see?
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Date: 2011-02-04 11:59 am (UTC)